Proposal Essay Response Berkelman

Explain how Edmondson responds to opposing points of view. Describe specific passages in which she counters those or concedes and refutes them.

  • She explains how the cheaper prices of larger corporations could cause a community more problems than benefits. Also, she explains how having large corporations in town could be damaging towards individuals, businesses, and the town in general.

Identify her main claim and at least three supporting claims. For each of these claims, describe one piece of support she has that is linked to each claim.

  • Main claim: Big Box Stores will destroy local businesses and small towns.
  • Other Claim: Money does not stay within the community.
    • Support: Uses quotes from an economic consultant.
  • Other Claim: Will ruin social connections.
    • Support: Maslows hierarchy of need.
  • Other Claim: Will close small/local businesses.
    • Support: Used a personal experience, won't have experiences like hers anymore.

Edmondson uses sources throughout her argument. Which ones are the most effective? Why?

  • She uses many personal experiences, which are strong because she is discussing something she went through personally. Also, she uses a lot of quotes, which add strength to her paper by having an expert support her views.


I. Intro (few first paragraphs)
The author talks about how the town she grew up in is community-based but explains how things have changed after she moved to a new town and notices the differences related to the community

II. Presents the negative impact of megastores on the community based on her move to a new town
Describes in detail how these megastores negatively effect the community in a cultural sense where people become much more dependent (in response to the counterargument that box stores are good for the community)
- Turns the community into a homogenous population
- Continues to describe the negative effects of box stores (in an economic sense) by stating that even though jobs are available, employees receive little to no benefits and the money doesn't stay in the community
- Anticipates the argument that prices are cheaper but argues that in a community sense, they're quite high
- Argues that a sense of independence is taken away as well as a deterioration of social bonds

III. Cause
Increase in number of box stores in communities

IV. Solution - Existence of "Middle-Ground"
Keep locally-owned businesses and hold community festivals/activities to maintain the culture aspect of the community (while also keeping the box stores)

Side Note: has counterargument but is mainly linked to establishing the problem; no opposing links to cause or solution (focused on one solution rather than incorporating all possible solutions)

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